James C. Guy

"I married you because I loved you. Now I love you because I married you."

I heard the above statement used on the radio the other day, and decided to "hang on" to it. So many people "fall in love" and marry. Things go well for a time, but then they say, "Im just not in love with him/her anymore. Ive fallen out of love." Notwithstanding consideration of the reasons and situations surrounding such a statement, love it not just something we "fall into" and "fall out of."

Paul describes love as having characteristics that go beyond feelings we have for the other person (I Corinthians 13). Instead of thinking you have fallen out of love with your spouse, try putting for the effort to fall in love with him/her. I pray married couples will decide to put forth the effort to go beyond the love that brought them together, to putting forth the effort it requires to STAY in love. To honor the marriage commitment in the vows and say, "I married you because I loved you. Now I love you because I married you."

It takes effort. The other person may not always put forth the effort that they should. But, we are only responsible for ourselves. Jesus did not love us when we were doing what we were supposed to do, but He loved us when we were His enemies (Romans 5:8-10). I John 4:10-11 says, "In this is love, not that we loved God, but that He loved us and sent His Son to be the propitiation for our sins. Beloved, if God so loved us, we also ought to love one another." That includes the one we "fell in love with" and married. Love your spouse, regardless of how you may "feel" about him/her, and you may find you will "feel" more in love again in the process.
James C. Guy
(Canal Heights church of Christ / THE BIBLE SAYS ministries)

Copyright 2001-James C. Guy All rights reserved.
*Permission granted to reprint for church or ministry use in free material (i.e. church bulletins, classes, sermons, etc.)

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